We Will Not Rock You

Despite its very happening website , Rock Star SuperNova is easily the worst show on TV. I’m serious; there is nothing worse on television that you could possibly find to watch. It makes American Idol look like The Sopranos by comparison. Suck City.

Even Hell’s Kitchen – with all of its screaming, backstabbing and chain smoking – has a higher entertainment factor.


HELP!!

I would not want any of SuperNova’s three members to hate me for saying this though, because it’s not personal. I love Tommy Lee unconditionally, despite his questionable choice of haircut for this show. Likewise, I have nothing against Gilby Clarke – who’s basically a luckier version of Tracy Guns – because his tenure as a fill in for Izzy Stradlin in the last decent version Guns ‘N’ Roses was the never-to-be-repeated career break of his lifetime. But I think Metal Sludge said it best when they summed up one of Gilby’s most recent solo efforts as “More songs about Mexico and Drinking.” I mean, Gilby doesn’t really have any new tricks up his sleeve: what you see is what you get. Finally, Jason Newsted will always have my sympathy for being kicked out of Metallica because his bandmates were jealous. James and Lars are such a couple of hyper-litigious dicks. He’s lucky to be rid of them.

But no matter how much I like/feel sorry for Jason, Tommy and Gilby, it can’t make up for the fact that none of the show’s contestants can sing his or her way out of a paper bag; a minor detail which is made a thousands times more heinous by their individual pretentious cluelessness. And let’s just get real here for one moment: SuperNova will never, never, never, never, ever pick a woman to front their band. It will never happen. Note to the Ladies: give up now.

I don’t give a crap who wins this waste of broadcast airtime, but I’m definitely curious to hear whatever “music” gets released in its wake. Someone let me know when it’s over.

Is this guy still on the show? Because he sucks worse than anyone.