Separated at Birth: Lorenzo Borghese and Trent Reznor

Lorenzo Borghese
Bachelor Number Nine

Has anyone out there noticed that Lorenzo Borghese, star of the 9th season of the semi-retarded reality freak show The Bachelor bears an amazing resemblance to the professionally morose Industrial music genius Trent Reznor? I sure did.

Trent Reznor 2006
Trent “Nobody Loves Me” Reznor

Of course, this line of thinking gets me to hypothesizing about how fun and utterly twisted it would be if ABC recruited Trent to be the next Bachelor contestant. Can you just imagine Trent looking for his potential life mate among 25 assorted Type O Negative fans and would-be-Myspace-Porn-Stars diluted with a few blonde-and-brainless-cheerleader types? How much would that rule?

Again, it reminds me of this silly article I wrote for the print version of Ink19 about ten years ago (back when I was a confused, horny fan who hadn’t yet figured out what an utter fraud Trent is) called Dream Date With Trent Reznor. Good times. I wish that piece was archived somewhere because it would be good to haul it out for a few belly laughs. But hopping back on my original train of thought, maybe if Trent could find true love and get laid on a regular basis, he could write some songs that didn’t go on and on about how depressed he is and how much it sucks to be a millionaire rock star who’s probably turned more sex than I’ve had. Yawn City.