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Warning: List May Contain Tiny Spoilers!
1. Wes Bentley’s Beard! I’d like to buy whatever he thinks are the best beard products. As gifts, of course.
2. Stanley Tucci’s Hair-do. Plus: Acting!
3. Elizabeth Banks’ Make Up!
4. Katniss & Peeta’s Flaming Parade Costumes! Fire!
5. Lenny Kravitz as a Costume Designer!
6. The “Apple” Scene!
7. Realistic Depiction of Acid Trip-style Hallucinations induced by Tracker Jacker Wasp Stings!
8. Josh Hutcherson: Hot!
9. “First Date with Crush: Camping Trip from Hell!”
10. Woody Harrelson kind of Playing Himself!
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About a hundred million billion years ago, I went to see a Halloween-themed movie called Trick or Treat, which was about a kid who brings a dead rock star back to life by playing one of his records backwards. The film had no “name” actors, minimal special effects and was a huge cheesefest, but compared to a new film I saw in preview last night, elaborately titled Cirque duFreak: The Vampire’s Assistant, it was the greatest piece of cinematic horror known to man.
Continue reading The Vampire’s Assistant: A Film That Truly Sucks →
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