Tag Archive | Jennifer Lawrence

Why I Would Want Miley Cyrus to Throw My Bachelorette Party

Miley Cyrus and Crew
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I think we can all agree that Miley Cyrus could throw the best, most phallic-inspired bachelorette party the world has ever seen.

The girl clearly knows how to party. The majority of her “makeover” since she started trying to shed her Disney image in 2008 has been based on over-the-top blowouts, crazy stage performances, scandalous outfits and tipsy nights out on the town. Combined together, all of these would make for one hell of a Henit.ie type of bachelorette party.

She’d obviously have no trouble bringing anything that resembled a penis, and I’m guessing she wouldn’t even have to visit a store. Throughout her Bangerz tour, some of Miley’s main props have included an anatomically correct sex doll and a 5-foot-long inflatable penis that she rides and rubs all over herself. And if her Twitter pictures are any indication, her collection of sex toys appears impressive. In that photo, it looks as if she’s holding an item called Belladonna’s Magic Hand, which Adam and Eve describes as being molded from the famous porn star’s hand with “life-like Sil-A-Gel material.” According to a reviewer here, it’s apparently also good for taking out intruders, which means Miley could be the muscle during your night on the town!

Miley Cyrus Tongue
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Some might think that she only acts like that while she’s on stage or in the public eye and wouldn’t be the same in person. Whether or not it’s an elaborate act to change her image, she’s obviously fully committed to and really enjoys playing the role no matter where she is. She’s even seen as the crazy party girl by others in the industry who would normally see right through such a publicity stunt.

A post on MTV from Jersey Shore star Snooki revealed that other celebrities don’t have much of a different perspective of her. When discussing what she would give out as Christmas presents last year, Snooki said, “I would get [Miley Cyrus] a lot of Christmas presents that involve vibrators and some sex toys and…really hot stripper outfits,” Snooks says in the clip. “Awww, she’s like a sexy guidette Christmas elf!”

Sexy Christmas elf or not, the girl has a flair for the phallus and partying. Made obvious by the birthday party she threw for ex-boyfriend Liam Hemsworth’s 2012, she even already knows where to get a penis cake in my favorite flavor. TMZ snapped pictures of her taking a bite out of the red velvet cake with chocolate frosting.

She also doesn’t seem to be the girl that gets too drunk and ruins the party for everyone else. In fact, she’d probably make sure others didn’t either. Jennifer Lawrence recounted a story in an interview on Late Night with Seth Myers about the time that she and Miley were both at SOMEONE’S Oscars after-party. Lawrence had too much to drink and ended up puking off the front porch. She said, “I was in such bad condition, and I look behind me while I’m puking, and Miley Cyrus is there like, ‘Get it together.’ ”

All this being said, I wouldn’t trust her standing next to me on my wedding day. She would probably try to lick the bouquet or something. But I sure as hell would be confident putting her in charge of a pre-wedding party. She’d probably come up with something more talked about than the wedding, and I’m sure it would be so epic that I wouldn’t mind a bit.

This has been a Guest Post

Furnished by Adam and Even

Who Will Win an Oscar On March 2nd? Our Predictions Are In!

Best Picture Oscar Collage
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It’s no secret that I couldn’t care less about most awards shows – the Grammy’s being a prime example of a formerly held-sacred-by-me tradition that long ago became all about rewarding commercial success over acknowledging artistic merit. But being a huge movie fan, film awards like The Independent Spirit Awards, The Golden Globes and, coming up on March 2nd, The Oscars (whose list of nominees can be found at This Link) are the nights of ceremonial award giving that I shamelessly indulge in. Because to me, those awards are still more about the art than the box office returns.

Over the Christmas holidays, I had the chance to get caught up on a handful of the films that would become contenders for the major category awards of 2014 including American Hustle, The Wolf of Wall Street, Dallas Buyers Club, Her (which I didn’t care for) and indie favorites like Inside Llewyn Davis, which got a little Golden Globe love but was virtually ignored by the Academy, despite being excellent on every level.

Wolf of Wall Street Dollar
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If you’re passionate about film, it’s fun to predict who might win the Oscars in various categories – and for those inclined to wager a little cash on the outcomes, or who simply want water cooler bragging rights the day after, Sports Betting Dime has their odds posted right now (by the way, if fractional odds confound you, whichever film has the lowest number – less than a value of 1 being ideal – is the favorite to win). Two of the Best Picture NomineesGravity and 12 Years a Slave – I’ve yet to see. But there is still time! Here are a few of my personal favorites and some of my own predictions.

My favorite film of those nominated is American Hustle. The script and direction are excellent, the cast perfect, with top notch acting by all five major characters, and I also really love The Soundtrack. American Hustle won the Golden Globe for Best Comedy, while 12 Years a Slave took the Globe for Best Drama. Since with Oscars there is no categorical subdivision, I predict American Hustle will lose the Best Picture category to 12 Years a Slave.

When I saw Dallas Buyer’s Club, I couldn’t imagine that any other actor would deserve the Best Actor Oscar more than Matthew McConaughey, who won the Golden Globe for Best Actor in a Drama. Chiwetel Ejiofor is McConaughey‘s stiffest Oscar competition for his starring role in 12 Years a Slave. It could really go either way on this, but Sports Betting Dime slightly favors McConaughey in what is a pretty close race.

As with the Golden Globes, McConaughey’s Dallas Buyer’s Club co-star, Jared Leto, is a favorite (and my favorite) to win his first Academy Award for Best Supporting Actor for his role as a transgendered AIDS victim. He was just amazing.

Cate Blanchett completely owned Blue Jasmine and no one else in the Best Actress Category even comes close. Not even Meryl Streep. Cate FTW!

Best Supporting Actress is either going to Lupita Nyongo for 12 Years a Slave or Jennifer Lawrence (who won the Golden Globe) for American Hustle.

The Best Director award could go to anybody, with the exception of Alexander Payne for Nebraska, a film that only the critics and the people involved with the film seem to like. My choice would be David O. Russell for American Hustle, but if it went to, say, Steve McQueen (12 Years a Slave) or Martin Scorsese (The Wolf of Wall Street) I wouldn’t say they didn’t deserve it. Gravity is supposed to be an epic film but if Alfonso Cuaron wins for directing it my head will explode.

And last but not least, if I gave out the awards, Best Picture would go to American Hustle, but I am pretty sure 12 Years a Slave is going to get it, because slavery was way worse than ABSCAM.

Who do you like to win in each category? Feel free to leave your picks in the comments below, and I’ll see you in front of the TV on March 2nd, 2014!

Top Ten Most Awesome Things About The Hunger Games!

Wes Bentley Beard
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Warning: List May Contain Tiny Spoilers!

1. Wes Bentley’s Beard! I’d like to buy what he thinks is the best beard products. As gifts, of course.
2. Stanley Tucci’s Hair-do. Plus: Acting!
3. Elizabeth Banks’ Make Up!
4. Katniss & Peeta’s Flaming Parade Costumes! Fire!
5. Lenny Kravitz as a Costume Designer!
6. The “Apple” Scene!
7. Realistic Depiction of Acid Trip-style Hallucinations induced by Tracker Jacker Wasp Stings!
8. Josh Hutcherson: Hot!
9. “First Date with Crush: Camping Trip from Hell!”
10. Woody Harrelson kind of Playing Himself!