Ringo Starr Will Accept No More Fan Mail!

“Stop With the Fan Mail, Will Ya? Peace Out.”

As much as I love Ringo Starr, everybody knows that the former Beatles’ drummer – despite being one of the wealthiest, most successful and most popular musicians in the history of world – is generally the butt of all Beatles-related jokes. That’s likely due to the widely perpetuated style of humor known as the “Drummer Joke” and the easily-dispelled-but-still-fun myth that the drummer in every band is retarded. We all know that isn’t true, and that the drummer is in fact the most important member of the band. Plus Ringo is actually a bad ass on the kit.

So, I wonder why Ringo is doing something as lame-o as asking fans not to send him fan mail. Come on Ringo! Everybody who knows anything about The Beatles  knows you haven’t signed autographs in 20 years, and nobody who isn’t completely delusional would actually expect to get a reply to a fan letter sent to a former member of The Beatles. So why make a formal announcement? Why act like a douche? Ringo, my tiny Beatle heart just broke a little.