Restaurant Review: Get Your Effin’ Breakfast at Effin Egg

effin egg welcome sign photo by gail worley
All Photos By Gail

Do you remember the first time you heard the brand name Effen Vodka, and how it made you giggle and make adolescent jokes? While Effen, appropriately, means ‘smooth’ in Dutch, a new breakfast place in the Flatiron neighborhood, Effin Egg is all about getting some effin’ eggs, man! We are officially here for the eggs and the jokes, because Effin Egg — which celebrated its grand opening on September 8th  — is serving up a wide variety of  tasty breakfast treats with a side of hilarious snark. Win win!

effin egg now open photo by gail worley

Effin Egg is a fast-casual breakfast shop bringing its brand to NYC after opening shops in Florida, Georgia and Tennessee.  Inspired by a true love of eggs, the menu boasts classic comfort fare with a twist, using only the freshest and finest ingredients (include bread baked in-house).   Let’s take a look at the menu!

effin egg menu 1 photo by gail worley

Effin Egg serves  a variety of gourmet breakfast sandwiches for carnivores and vegetarians alike. Not just a morning staple, Effin Egg’s signature egg sandwiches (there’s even a double-cheese burger) hit the spot for lunch as well.

effin menu 2 photo by gail worley

To provide you with options that will satisfy any egg craving you might have,  the shop serves popular Mexican-style classics like breakfast tacos, burritos and bowls.

effin menu 3 photo by gail worley

Items that are new to the New York menu include the Virgin Pancakes and Slutty Rainbow Pancakes — which I am dying to try. Munchies-satisfying side orders like Brisket Tater Tots (OMG) and Dirty Papas (crinkle-cut french fries topped with queso, brown gravy, sour cream and green onions) are among other unique takes on breakfast favorites. Are you hungry yet?

pastry case photo by gail worley

Look: Pastries!

potheads welcome sign photo by gail worley

If you are a coffee purist who would like to skip the line at Starbucks (and who wouldn’t)  Effin Egg welcomes the Potheads and Java Junkies among us. Their remarkably strong  coffee is a custom Sumatra blend of beans that are slow roasted in small batches daily to give you the best tasting coffee around.

effin egg swag photo by gail worley

All of Effin Egg’s Signature Sauces (Avocado Creama, Chipotle Ketchup, and The EFF U Sauce – a Spicy Jalapeño Aioli) are made in house as well and are available to purchase, along with other branded swag like coffee mugs, thermoses and T Shirts.

effin egg t shirts photo by gail worley
effin catering photo by gail worley

Effin Egg offers catering!

effin egg interior shot 2 photo by gail worley

I paid a visit to Effin Egg on a Sunday morning, when the joint was definitely jumping. Designed primarily as a grab-and-go establishment, you can see they do offer seating for up to five patrons — two at a small table and three at the counter.

interior shot 1 photo by gai worley
order online sign photo by gail worleyman ordering at kiosk photo by gail worley

So that all hands can be focused on making your order and serving you as efficiently as possible, customers can either scan a QR code to order online, or use the touch-screen kiosk. If you have a question or need help, it’s easy to catch a team member’s attention, and they will be happy to assist you.

effin egg to go bag and cup photo by gail worley

After considering all of my options, I ordered a coffee and a Javier’s Burrito, stuffed fat  with cage-free scrambled eggs, shredded hash browns, thick cut bacon, black beans, shredded jack and cheddar cheeses, and pico de gallo, and served with a  side of fresh tomatillo salsa. Next, I walked a block over to beautiful Madison Square Park (where you can easily snag a table from Shake Shack) and got ready to devour my purchase.

breakfast is served photo by gail worley

Everyone knows that the proper way to eat a burrito is to leave it mostly wrapped and just peel the wrapper down as you go, so that everything holds together and you can avoid making a mess, but I wanted see what I was working with, so I opened the wrapper to assess the situation.

interior burrito close up photo by gail worley

As you can see, this burrito is conveniently cut in half, so I took the sheet of foil, wrapped it, and ate it one half at time. Efficiency!  Be sure to grab extra napkins and a spoon, just in case you need it.

burrito interior photo by gail worley

Look at all that delicious goodness!

foil wrapped burrito photo by gail worley

It’s nice to have all of your favorite breakfast foods wrapped up in a delicious flour tortilla and topped with very tasty tomatillo sauce, which just makes everything better. This burrito may not look super huge, but trust me it is quite satisfying. I did not get hungry again for the rest of the day.

I had a great experience at Effin Egg and am looking forward to going back again for those Slutty Rainbow Pancakes. Eff yeah!

Effin Egg is Located at 38 East 23rd Street (between Park and Madison) in the Flatiron District. The Shop is open 7 days a week from 7:00 AM to 3:00 PM Eastern time. For more information, or to place an order online for in-store pick up, please visit effinegg.com.

separated burrito photo by gail worleygood effin mornin photo by gail worley

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