It’s no secret that I’m a serious romantic sap-a-holic: all “in love with love” and shit like that. It’s pretty ridiculous. So I am understandably beyond devastated and completely inconsolable, having just heard the news that one of my favorite show biz couples,Sarah Silverman and Jimmy Kimmel, have broken up. Man, this is a drag. They looked so cute together and they were both politically incorrect comedians! How can you not make that work? Maybe the break-up had something to do with the fact that Jimmy was Fucking Ben Affleck.
Bringing Sexy Back…Not!
Tell me its not true: Matt Damon Voted Sexiest Man Alive.
Uh, Matt Damon? Seriously? Um, I think not. Matt Damon is gross. I can think of at least ten guys I know who are hotter and sexier than Matt Damon.
Gail’s Choice for Ten Living Men Who are Sexier Than Matt Damon
- Keith Nelson from Buckcherry
2. Bloated, nearly 50-year-old, Post Rehab Nikki Sixx
3. Anderson Cooper, oh yes.
4. Neal Smith circa 1972
5. My Gay Friend Geoffrey
6. Co-host of Project Runway, Tim Gunn
7. Chef Tom Colicchio Holding Raw Meat
8. Yul Kwan from Survivor
9. Gentleman Rock Star, Bill Rieflin
10. Simpsons’ Cartoon Version of Terry
The next time that People magazine has one of these “Sexiest Man” polls, they need to get in touch with me. Because I will set them straight.