The Donut Burger is not a myth or culinary legend: it really exists. Originally invented by the late R&B singer, Luther Vandross when he ran out of hamburger buns and instead placed his delicious meaty burger between two glazed donuts, the donut burger and its assorted variations, such as the Bacon and Egg Brunch Burger really do exist. Imagine how much more popular, controversial (and deadly) McDonald’s would be if only they dared to add a McDonut Burger to their morning breakfast menu? Mmmm . . . so tasty!
In a perfect world everything would be as stark and void of color as >these cupcakes. They are baneful in their absolute disdain for your tastelessness, and are true misanthropes as far as baked goods go.
Make Them:
Cake:
3 cups flour
2 cups sugar
1/2 cup cocoa powder
2 tsp. baking soda
1 tsp. salt
2/3 cup oil
2 tsp. vanilla
2 tsp. apple cider vinegar
2 cups cold water
Cream Cheese Sea of Woe:
8 oz. Cream Cheese (softened!!!)
1/3 cup sugar
1 large egg
Chocolate Chips
Preheat oven to 350 degrees
In a large bowl sift together: flour, sugar, cocoa powder, baking soda and salt.
Add: Oil, vanilla, vinegar, cold water
Stir gently until just combined. Too much friction annihilates the bubbles!
In a small bowl stir together until creamy:
Softened cream cheese, sugar and egg. Add as many chocolate chips as you can stand.
Fill cupcake tins about half full of cake batter and drop cream cheese mixture by the spoonful into each one.
Bake 15-20 minutes, or until toothpick inserted into cakey part comes out clean. Let cool and decorate with a splattering of melted chocolate.
Best enjoyed when paired with obscure French Black Metal.
This is a picture of a layer cake made of ground beef and frosted with mashed potatoes to make a hearty Meatloaf Cake. I’m a big fan of meatloaf, so it looks pretty tasty to me. You can find out how to make your very own meatloaf cake right here.
